In the first post in this series, I talked about unity as Christians agreeing on top tier issues. What are top tier issues? That God is father, son and Holy Spirit, and that it is only through God the Son, Jesus’ birth, life, death and resurrection that sin, death and the devil are defeated, and we have access to new life, both abundant life now and the hope of eternal life after death.
That is a really, really small top tier. Perhaps we could add a few things. But that’s where the temptation snags us. We think, “Well, surely to be a good Christian we need to agree about more than that, don’t we?” And then we start adding. What we believe about the Bible, of course, right? And we go on and on adding more and more beliefs that we say are non-negotiable until soon enough, our top tier is huge. Then we start thinking that a true Christian is only one who agrees with all kinds of beliefs in our top tier.
I think Paul is saying something very different in 1st Corinthians chapters 8 and 10. Paul teaches us to allow for freedom of disagreement by keeping our second and third tiers wide open for loving, gracious disagreement. Unity, not uniformity.
Be humble and teachable, always willing to say, “I could be wrong about this.” Years ago I had a conversation with someone about a social issue. We were both Christians, and we disagreed about the issue. That person was unwilling to say they could possibly be wrong. It was only after I explained that disciples of Jesus should be humble and teachable that this person would concede that they might be 1% wrong about their view.
We can have strong opinions. We can believe we are in the right, but we should always be willing to admit it is possible that we are wrong, we should be willing to pause to try to understand where the other person’s perspective is coming from. What might we be missing? It is simply not worth it to break fellowship over. “They will know we are Christian’s by our LOVE.”
I was in a meeting recently with a person who was displaying tendencies of being a know-it-all. Have you ever experienced that? They have a comment about everything, and their perspective is authoritative. We Christians do not need to have a spirit of authority when sharing our opinions. Instead we demonstrate the Fruit of the Spirit.
We can invite others to have a conversation, to research, to learn. We need to have a healthy view of ourselves, remembering that our personality, our viewpoint, our experiences, our studies are not authoritative. We don’t have it all figured out. Deep down inside, even if we might think, “I am almost certain that I am right about my perspective,” we need to lead with humility and teachability. We need to be listeners, asking questions.
We avoid arguing, and especially we avoid seeking to win arguments. Do not believe the lie that winning arguments will win people over. It usually just makes things worse. When people lose an argument, they will not likely think, “Thank you so much for defeating me in that argument, I now see the truth.” No, they usually feel awful because defeat feels awful, and they actually become more entrenched in their view.
Instead, be a learner, a listener, a questioner, and have a conversation, with a heart to grow, quick to admit you might be wrong. Ask God to show you where you might need to grow.
I also encourage you to put in the work by intentionally listening to points of view that do not affirm what you already believe. If you are a person who regularly listens to one side of the political spectrum, start listening to the other side. Seek out more balance. It is rarely the case that one side is all wrong, and the other side is all right. Avoid that kind of polarized thinking, by listening to the other side, the other person with an open mind, wanting to understand where the other person is coming from.
And when there is error in your thinking, own up to it. When there is error in other people’s thinking, don’t gloat, but graciously embrace them.
Do not let an opinion or a perspective that you carry overpower the heart of sacrificial love, care, fellowship and unity that God calls us to. God IS love. That is so much more than just “God is loving”. God IS love. So, that should be a bedrock part of our conversations and interactions with people, whether we carry the same opinions on issues or not.
This is why I love that at Faith Church we are seeking to be a place where people from a variety of viewpoints and backgrounds can warmly, graciously, lovingly commune with one another in real relationships.
Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash
Engaging Scripture 