
In Titus 1:5-9, Paul says leaders of the church should be blameless. This week we have been looking closely at this passage to see if we can learn what blameless leadership is all about. In today’s post, we see that Paul tells Titus to look for leaders who have demonstrated a number of qualities that are non-negotiable.
First, in verse 6, Paul says that blameless leaders have one wife. Is he talking about polygamy here? Did the Romans have multiple wives? It is highly doubtful, historians tell us, that polygamy occurred much in the Greco-Roman world. Instead, it seems that Paul is referring to the common practice in which Greek and Roman men would have concubines. Sadly, this wasn’t considered aberrant in their culture. It was accepted. Paul says Christians will have a different viewpoint. They will not have concubines. Christians will have only one wife. In other words, church leaders’ should have a high view of the sanctity of marriage. Why? Their marriages will have a profound impact on those leaders’ relationship to the church, and vice versa. What this means is that Titus should be looking for leaders who have strong marriages, and who protect their marriages from infidelity.
Next in verse 6, Paul says that blameless leaders of the church will have faithful children. That’s a tough one because at a certain point, kids who have been raised in a loving home can choose to rebel. Even if they were raised right, and at no fault of their parents, they might choose to give up the faith. While grace needs to rule the day here, Paul has something important for parents and kids to consider. Parents are to parent their kids toward faithfulness, and kids are to choose to be faithful. What you teach your children and how you parent matters. God doesn’t want leaders who are all about leading in the church but not caring for and leading in their homes. That is part of being blameless; it’s a lifestyle that you are living, not just a way you behave in one spot.
Paul goes on to tell Titus to look for blameless leaders who see themselves as God’s stewards. The word he is using here is defined as a household manager. The leader of a church does not own the church, God does. Paul says, therefore, that the blameless leader will view the church as God’s work. None of us should think that we own the church, or that the church is somehow ours. It is God’s. We are simply stewards, managing the church for God. That means Titus should look to appoint leaders who handle the church like God desires.
After talking about blameless leaders’ various roles and relationships, he talks about their character. Under the general principle of blamelessness, Paul now says that these leaders will be people who avoid five things and attain six things.
The blameless leaders avoids the following five vices. They are not:
- Over-bearing. This is an arrogance that is the result of self-will and stubbornness. They think they are so much better than everyone else. They are always looking down on others, always saying, “I am better.”
- Quick-tempered. The person is a bully.
- Addicted to wine. This could be expanded to addiction in any of its many forms.
- Violent. This is a person who is ready and willing to pick fights. They are demanding.
- Pursuing dishonest gain. Specifically this word has greed at its core. This person is shamefully greedy.
As I look at this list of five vices, the word “narcissist” comes to mind. While I don’t believe narcissism encapsulates all that Paul is talking about here, it sure relates to much of the five. What is narcissism? As the Gravity Leadership crew discovers in this fascinating and helpful podcast interview with Chuck DeGroat, narcissism is more than “a person who is in love with themselves.” Narcissists have a strange attraction for many of us, and yet they’ve caused immeasurable damage. After listening to the podcast, I’m convinced Paul would say to Titus, “a church leader must not be a narcissist.”
So what kind of character qualities should Titus be looking for? Paul says that the blameless leader will demonstrates that they are pursuing six virtues (starting in verse 8). They are:
- Hospitable. This word has a connotation of hospitality particularly to strangers.
- Loving what is good. This person really likes goodness.
- The NIV 84 says the third quality is “self-controlled”, but the word the NIV 84 translates as “disciplined” at the end of the list in verse 8 is better translated “self-controlled.” Granted, they are very much related. The word here is more about what is prudent. A person who is sensible, making wise decisions.
- Righteous, “upright”. This person does what God requires. Follows God’s ways. It is more outward.
- “Holy”. A person who is growing a heart that is more and more like Jesus. It is more inward.
- Self-controlled. See #3 above. This person is in control of their emotions and choices.
That’s quite a list, isn’t it? It seems like only Jesus would qualify. Years ago I served on a denominational team that was administrating the process of nominating candidates for the role of Bishop. In my denomination, the Bishop is the leader of the whole denomination, and thus we created a list of qualities that we were looking for. We used biblical passages like Titus 1:5-9, and the result had me thinking, “No one fits this. A person would have to be perfect. We’re looking for Jesus, and there was only one Jesus.” But as we discussed earlier in this week’s series, blameless leadership does not equal perfection. You might review that discussion, as the list above could be intimidating. Paul did not intend to give Titus an impossible task, but he does set the bar high.
In conclusion, Paul says, “Titus, look for people who have distinguished themselves using these lists. Appoint them to be leaders.”
And what will these leaders do? Paul has a job description for them, which we will look at in the next post.
Joel, thought you’d find it interesting that narcissism is a common characteristic of people who commit espionage (violate trust). They believe that they’re above the law and rules and that allows them to decide what is good and bad without any norms of good and bad. My friend, Bob Hanssen, the FBI spy, was a narcissist and in hindsight I see it more clearly than I did in person. Narcissist are great fakers. They have no inner moral compass, but they can fake it as though they do.
Well, all that to say, I agree, you don’t want a narcissist as a church elder.
Uncle Jim
p.s. I am bring cotton candy and peeps along with Gibbles potato chips to Cape May for the day we’ll be there (Thursday evening and Friday day time).
That’s really interesting! Thanks Uncle Jim. It seems to me that a number of the recent high-profile megachurch pastor failures might have narcissism at the root of the problem. Gravity Leadership is doing an excellent podcast series on abuse of power.
Sounds great about the candy and chips! Looking forward to it!